9 Apr 2012

Review of The Titanic Spa Huddersfield


 Titanic Spa can only be described as enchanting, and to receive tickets for an overnight stay for me and my sister is a Christmas present we only dare to dream of. To that end, this post is not indicative of my lifestyle  but rather my experience of one of the loveliest places on earth and a big thankyou to Mum and Dad. It was our second visit and we timed it to coincide with my sisters birthday in early February.
My sister, who you all know as Redhead picked me up early so we could start drinking  relaxing as soon as possible. A quick trip to Aldi to stock up on cheap booze healthy supplies and our road trip began.
Huddersfield is a short, scenic drive from Manchester, through blackened industrial villages and breathtaking snow tipped hill passes.
 (TheCo-Op conveniently situated just before the left turn for the spa both gives you the chance to acquire any last minute bits and lets you know you're nearly there if you're as bad at understanding directions and maps as I am)
The last thing you'll do that requires any physical exertion until you leave the following day is unload your car.
The absolute only improvement I can imagine for the Spa would be a little spa-gnome to come out and actually do this for you, but there is, I imagine, such a thing as being too indulged.

 Last time I came to Titanic, I had the Elemis lavender facial massage and treatment and actually wanted to hug the little girl who did it for me.
 This time I'm stood in the car park looking at my small bags and and thinking "Ugh, do I have to do everything around here myself."
Every inch of the huge converted mill has been designed to relax and reassure you, still I can't help but think of the women over time who must have sat behind them, wishing their sweaty, dirty working day over with, and here we were, dying to get in.
The hair salon and cosmetic beauty salon is also situated here, and while there are POS displays of professional cosmetics and treats, at no time will you be pressured to part with extra money.
We were asked once if we would like to book any extra treatments and not one flicker of "loser"flashed across the receptionists face when we declined.
Check in is swift and you are given a magnetised band to wear about your wrist which unlocks the bathroom lockers. You tag your luggage, with your NAME not apartment number (see, perfect customer care) and a lovely spa-gnome whisks all your chattels away unseen.
 We were approached by a spa colleague who offered us a complimentary hand treatment. I have something wrong with my wrists and fingers which I am calling RSI for want of proper diagnosis, and Redhead had done something to her hand (we were really ready for this break) and after taking this into consideration she gave us a lovely warming relaxing massage and chatted to us about the adventures that had led her to working at the Spa including cruise ships and her own salon. I love staff that are open and friendly, it's such a rare treat among these days of sales driven targets and KPIs.



As we arrived at around 11am and apartments aren't ready until 2pm, it's a very good time to dive straight in to the Heat and Ice Experience. This has been designed to give a holistic or singular treatment to its visitors.A lushly carpeted dimly lit foyer leads you into a chamber of  glass doored rooms built around the  Experience Showers. I always feel like Lucy stepping into Narnia from the wardrobe, only, you know, old and stuff. Outside each room are guidelines for duration, features and benefits.
You can go around in the order the rooms are built, which is recommended, or just do whatever your curiosity and heart desire..
We lay in glittering splendour, soothed by aromatics so rich, yet never cloying that all the Manchester hardness we arrived with literally melted away. 
We waddled, swathed in towelling robes and felt like newborns, all safe and wet and warm and protected from the world. 
We caught up with each others long forgotten news in hushed tones and bursts of giggles in a way you can only do when children, bills and drudgery are temporarily far away.
We frolicked and jiggled and sauna'd our weary bits to our hearts content. 
We drank mineral water and drenched ourselves in spring water. 
We plunged and jacuzzi'd and passed secret looks and nods at the more extroverted 'couples' there. Snogging? In MY Narnia? No thanks. We ate a lovely generous buffet lunch and speculated about the people sharing our stay. A healthy mix of Mum and Daughter mini breakers and couples having what used to be called a dirty weekend (or mid-week)
  Nothing exhausts you quite like indulgence, and rose wine at lunch time, so we decide to occupy our apartment.
Its such a lovely feeling walking back into reception amongst departing guests knowing your stay is just beginning. 
On wobbling blissed out limbs we found our way to the top floor and, filled with a fresh burst of energy explored our home for the night. You get two floors of show home styled comfort. Magical spa-gnomes had stocked our fridge with the treats we'd brought with us and the bathroom (glossy, sleek, contemporary, very clean 10/10) was well stocked with Elemis goodies.
And there, I'm ashamed to say, we collapsed into a sofa-wine-Maltesers coma and didn't really move until a sumptuous supper at eight, served in style and with perfect customer care (of course) by all the bistro staff.
 I recommend the beef strip salad and the salmon is naturally wonderful. Sloping our full spoilt tummies back to the apartment we drank too much and tried to spy in on neighbouring apartments through balcony windows.

In the morning I treated Redhead to a birthday breakfast in bed, and we decided to have one last swim and whizz around the spa. 
It was heavenly to have the place all to ourselves so early and we even got to use the elusive foot baths with bubbles this time! 
Sadly, like all fairy tales, The End must come and it was time to settle up (the odd Rose here and red wine there...ahem) and leave, glowing, exhilarated and refreshed into another cold February day. 
I'll never forget either time I've spent at The Titanic, not really for the self indulgence, but the precious time spent with the little sis and the chance to just be the best 'us' we can be. I only hope all the staff there know what wonders they perform everyday to everyday folk like us, and the appreciation that lives on long after the payments have gone through and the swimming cossies have dried out. So thankyou to them all from the large lady and the Redhead.

Cheers Mum and Dad.




This is SO not M and S shopping.

Happiness is a fresh warm robe
A word about bathrooms. Wherever I go, I check out the bathrooms.
Clubs, friends, restaurants, workplaces. If it has a disappointing bathroom, I'm not going to enjoy being there. Needless to say, the bathrooms are splendid.
Waiter service bistro. Light buffet lunch advertised is actually immensely satisfying 'choice of 2 carbs and 2 savoury' dishes PLUS hearty salads and fresh breads. No lettuce leaf and wheatgrass shots here. Although I'm sure if you asked for it, they would whip it up for you.


Low lit tiled experience shower area




The Ice Room for example is not something I used this time, as my fingers react very badly to cold temperatures but Redhead loves it. Its still a beautiful environment to cool down slightly after the herbal infusion room.You rub yourself with crushed ice or wrap ice in flannels to carry about with you. I find it useful to hold one of these little ice packs against my lips in the hotter rooms so I don't get claustrophobic.
glittering aromatherapy room, chases away the doldrums like nothing on earth
had to brighten this shot a lot to get it to show up
Trying to resist references to Dali but finding it really hard. Ok, how about space pod Rome?
Plunge if you're brave...very cold!
Thats better





Temperatures rising, barometers getting loooow. It was NOT however, raining men.
See that..its got my name on it

Relaxation lounge, all brown velvet and dark. Was too full to use this time, I have a fear of snoring in public also. Be grateful.
One of the cubicles, last one empty so for the sake of sisterhood, we both left.
Pristine.
We have arrived.









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